Don't Trim Your Feelings

This is an old post I wrote in the summer of 2013, I thought it was entertaining to I  decided to post it now.
***********************************2013****************************************

I have a ton of blog post in my draft folder that I can never post because let's face it, they aren't funny. Actually they are kind of depressing. Let me explain why.... Graduating college sucks! There is no rhyme or reason to it, it just does.

So that being said I thought of a way to express the evil of life changing experience in a slightly humorous way: Changing your hair. If you have ever seen the show Girl Code you will know that they have a segment called " don't trim your feelings" the reason why they talked about it is because for some reason every time girls go through a traumatic experience they end up changing their hair. 

I am no exception to this rule. I've been doing it for years with out even realizing it. The end of my freshman year of college I dyed my hair jet black. In my junior year I got it chemically straightened. But my senior year was the worst. Around finals time in December I decided I once again was tired of having curly hair so I got it straightened again ( this wasn't that dramatic ). 

(Black hair freshman year)

(My hair chemically straightened)

Then at the beginning of the second semester I was getting really overwhelmed with work so what did I do ? I just spontaneously got the ombré done. This was a huge change and I hated it. But, my friends and family liked it so I decided to keep it. 

 

                                                   ( How I felt I looked like with ombre hair)

                                                                 (Blonde ombre hair)

 

Now 2 days before graduation I was freaking out so I decided to get a major hair cut. I ended up cutting off like 5 inches. The day after graduation I still wasn't handling the stress well so I went to the salon and had them bleach my hair blonde. Why? I have no idea! But I did it. 

                                                                 (Blonde short hair)

 

Now it's July and I'm starting to go on job interviews so what do I feel like doing ? Dying my hair jet black! I'm trying to talk myself out of it but I'm getting really tired of this look so I'll see what happens.

*************************ONE YEAR LATER**********************************

A couple months after I wrote this post I decided to go back to my natural hair color.  I thought I was done dying my hair but once may came along I felt the urge to dye my hair black again. So my advice to every girl out there don't trim your feelings...but it's okay if you dont follow my advice. Everyone goes through it and its fun to look back and see how you have evolved. Maybe by this time next year it will be purple.

                                                            ( My hair back to normal )

                                                             ( My hair black now )

(My hair maybe next year lol)

 

I Don’t Know About You… But I’m No Longer 22!

Recently, I saw a blog about a woman who came up with a list of 49 things she wanted to do before she turned 50. It made me kind of sad because I ALWAYS make “bucket list”, and I’ve never done anything on them. So, the other night ( it just felt like one of those nights) I made a list of things I wanted to do before I turned 23. I like to think that they will find a cure for 23 before I get there, but just incase I better dress up like hipsters  get started on the list.

1) Get fitted for a bra professionally

2) Have the confidence to wear a crop top

3) Run the 5K train at Sunken Meadow State Park with out walking cardiac hill

4) Learn to make 10 new mixed drinks

5) Invent my own drink

6) Go paddle boarding

7) Hiking upstate

8) Buy a race bike

9) Try 3 new classes at the gym

10) Do a double spin class on a Saturday morning

11) Sneak into a movie

12) Take a self-defense class

13) Take a wine painting class

14) Learn to cook

15) Eat pudding out of a mayo jar in public

16) Do a triathlon in less than 2 hours

17) Go out one night with no make up on

18) Buy a guy a drink

19) Meet a friend in the city and take the subway there by myself

20) Eat cake on the beach

21) Bike to the beach

22) Take a dance class

I most likely wont be doing these in any particular order. I promise to update you on how I'm happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way because 22 is miserable and magical!

LIU Post Oral Competency Exam

If you are reading this blog post you most likely go to Long Island University Post (or C.W Post) and you have to take the Oral Competency Exam. Now there is very little information online about this test and no one I know took it. Yet we need it to graduate. I'm writing this post because I'm a senior and I waited to the very last semester to take this test. The night before the test I tried to find information on what to expect. There is nothing so I'm going to document my experience taking this test so you know what to expect.

First you have to make an appointment to take it. I made mine during common hour. The test is only supposed to take about 10 minutes. The test takes place in the speech building (it’s behind the book store). You walk into the office, and you tell them your name. They will have you sit in the waiting area; there are a lot of old people there because they run a speech clinic. Once they are ready, a grad student will call your name and take you to a room. They will ask you a few questions about your hearing and then give you one of those hearing test where you have to raise your hand when you hear the beep. After you take the hearing test she gives you a sheet of paper with a paragraph on it and you have to read it out loud. The one I had to read was someone talking about their grandfather it was really weird. Just make sure you read it slowly and clearly.

That's it! It's a really easy test and I don't think anyone fails it, but I wanted to have some information on it online so future students don't get worked up about it like I did. I hope it helps!

As always follow me on twitter and tumblr. Also feel free to ask me any C.W Post related questions :).

Dr Oz 3 Day Cleanse

Two weeks ago I did the Dr Oz three day detox cleanse.  If you are thinking of doing it I should warn you it is extremely hard. I did it with my mom and I wouldn’t suggest doing it alone. Also I would suggest doing it when you are busy, although it is hard to get work done when you are hungry; it helps take your mind off eating. Here are the logs I did on my iPhone over the three days. Warning I was VERY bitchy and VERY cranky. But, this is an honest description on how the cleanse goes.

It's 9:15 on Tuesday night: I'm starting my 3 day cleanse tomorrow, its 4 different shakes made out of different fruits and vegetables. It's not supposed to be one of those cleanse that makes you drop 10lbs. in 3 days, however it is supposed to help you break your unhealthily habits and kick start your weight loss. Which I desperately need because I just stuffed my face with a croissant as a last meal cause you know I'm being overly dramatic and actually feel like I'll never eat again. I just hope not eating for 3 days doesn't turn me into a raging bitch! Lord help all the people who have to interact with me during these next few days!

9:00Am Wednesday: I had my first smoothie for breakfast and took my multi vitamin and my probiotic. The smoothie wasn't bad I got used to it and started to like it. I already messed up though! I completely forgot to have my detox green tea! Ugh! Maybe I can have it tonight instead.

12:00pm Wednesday: Time for meal 2! I put it in a water bottle to take it work. It is green and mushy and kind of hard to choke down. I think there might be coconut in this one and that's why I don't like it. I hope I'll be able to finish it. I really want a tuna melt.  

6:30pm Wednesday: It took me 2 hours to finish meal 2. Right now I'm starving! I'm drinking meal 3. It's much better than meal 2 but still not great. I feel like crap I'm tired and I feel like I'm coming down with a cold. I hope this crappy feeling is just all the toxins leaving my body. I don't know if I'll have enough energy to work out tonight or do my paper. This detox totally sucks!

9:30pm Wednesday: I've finished all my meals for the day and had my detoxing bath. The bath is with Epsom salt and lavender oil and very relaxing. The Epsom salt makes you sweat so it's another way of ridding your body to toxins. I've decided that I'm not actually hungry I'm just going through with drawl. I've been craving carbs all day and feel a little light headed I think that's because I'm addicted to them. Hopefully after this cleanse is over I won't crave processed carbs anymore! I'm optimistic that tomorrow will go better now that I know what to expect.

9:00am Thursday: I remembered to have the green tea with a lemon this morning. I feel really sick though and I don't think I'll be able to choke down breakfast. I can't wait for this cleanse to be over.

10:30am Thursday: I was able to drink my breakfast smoothie and I feel much better. I guess I didn't feel good because I was hungry. The breakfast smoothie is defiantly my favorite

1:00pm Thursday: I made a few modifications to meal 2. I added some water, melted the coconut oil, and put a few extra pieces of pineapple. The changes made the taste and texture more bearable but not by much. I actually feel pretty good now.

5:30pm Thursday: I'm starving and drinking my last meal right now, I don't even care about the taste anymore I just want something to fill me! This detox couldn't be over fast enough!

9:00pm Thursday: I just had my Epsom salt bath. I feel okay still kind of hungry I was supper cranky today! I yelled at almost every person I talked to, I was even kind of snippy to one of my professors. Right now I'm being stubborn because I don't want to make my meals for tomorrow. I cut myself while cleaning the blender and now I'm mad at it. Oy! I think I'm starting to lose my mind! Counting down the hours till it’s over!

8:30am Friday: IT'S MY LAST DAY! I couldn't be happier! I was so hungry last night I couldn't sleep. I'm choking down my green tea now. The only thing that is going to get me through the day is that it’s my last day!

9:00am Friday: I drank my last breakfast smoothie. I'm not really full from it. Today is going to be a long hungry day.

2:00pm Friday: I'm hungry cranky and miserable! The third day is the hardest. I can't even look at the green mush, let alone drink it. I hate this!

6:30pm Friday: I couldn't finish my lunch smoothie it was just too hard to choke down. I feel tired, grumpy, and weak. The dinner smoothie helps a little bit, but I'm still hungry! Thank god this is the last day!

*******I went out with friends Friday night and skipped the Epsom salt bath********

10:00am Saturday: So I ate real food today! It was amazing! I also got weighted today and I lost 8lbs!!! I'm super excited but also extremely nervous that I won't keep it off. The problem with these cleanses are that once you start eating again you gain all the weight back and sometimes more. Overall I'm not sure if I would do this again. It was extremely hard and I was miserable the whole time. I'm defiantly going to try to eat less.

 

It has been two weeks since I did the cleanse. I was able to keep the weight off so far. I’m thinking of trying it again when I feel my eating is getting out of control. If you are interested in doing it here is the link with all the information you need http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/dr-ozs-3-day-detox-cleanse-one-sheet. Also note it came about to be way more than 16 dollars a day per person. If you want to try it and have any questions about it you can tweet mehttps://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin or ask me on tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/.

Laugh Out Loud Worthy Blog : One Year Anniversary !

     Happy first birthday blog! One year ago today I wrote my first blog post! I'm very proud of myself; I was able to keep this blog going and get a few readers along the way.

     I remember writing my first blog post, it was the Wednesday before The Hunger Games came out and I just ordered my mockingjay necklace. FYI: I still have that necklace it has become a lucky charm that I wear every day. Also I ended up getting an A in that international business class, I think it was all the online shopping from people in China ;).

     A lot has changed in the last year. First I should talk about my most popular blog post "Rejection Hurts!" It has over a hundred views and it gets the most search results. So if you ended up reading this blog because you searched “Trader Joes rejection letter" or "how to laugh at rejection” let me give you a update. I now work in the marketing department of a consulting firm. It's a paid internship the perfect job for me. If I didn't get rejected from Trader Joes I probably would have taken the job, worked there all summer to make my parents happy, and I wouldn't have gained any experience in the field I've been studying for the last 4 years. Also I would have never have written that blog post and you would have never found me and we wouldn't be best friends! I consider everyone who reads this blog my best friend. Even if you are a creepy old man who isn't allowed to be within 100 feet of a school, we are best friends. So I call being best friends with you a win! To recap what we just learned.... If you get rejected from Trader Joes, you get your dream internship and over 100 new best friends!

     So let’s see, what else has happened in the past year? I survived Hurricane Sandy, it was a bitch, my family didn't have heat or power for about two weeks, and my school was closed for 2 weeks and we had to make up all the missed classes. I took 7 classes last semester; it was annoying making them all up. In the end I was lucky compared to most people. Some people lost everything! If you are looking to donate to help Hurricane  Sandy Victims click here -> http://sandyrelief.org/.

     This year I also discovered my love for reading. I've read tons of books this year and if your interested to see how I rate d and what I would recommend you can check out my Good Reads profile here -> http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/11416778-alyssa.

     If you are reading this blog because you searched my " texting" post,  "why you shouldn't scare old people" or " how to be less awkward"; you should be happy to know I still save my funny texts, I still play hilarious pranks on my family, and I'm still extremely socially awkward. So there will be tons of posts about that stuff.

     That's my one year update! Stay with me this year there are way more blog pots to come! As all ways follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and Tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/! Thanks for reading !

8 Things I Would Do If I Was The Retired Pope

The pope retiring today got me thinking about what I would do if I was retired, especially if I was as cool as the Pope. Warning not meant to be offensive just silly…

 

 

1) Date a  Kardashian:

Now that would be a reality show worth watching

 

2) Live tweet every Hollywood event:

He has a twitter might as well make good use of it


3)    Prank call Mel Gibson: 

 
There’s no reason I just think it would be funny


4)   Write a “tell all book”:

 

He has to have the juiciest gossip (think of all the confessions!)


5) Become the Easter bunny:
 

It’s still kind of in his field of work


6) Become a contestant on dancing with the stars:



Church choirs have the best rhythm he could be good too!


7) Start a pope boot camp:

 

Help train prospective popes and give lessons on how to rock that hat


8) Become a judge on American idol : 



He would have good authority to decide who sings like an angel

Reasons Why He/She Didn't Text You Back

Have you ever sent a text to someone only to have it rudely ignored? This happens to me a lot! Now being that I’m a total narcissist, know the reasons I get ignored aren’t because of me. Here are some very real reasons why your boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend, mailman, lab partner etc. didn’t text you back.

1)      They saw your text and got so excited they fainted then hit their head. They are in a comma and will text you as soon as they wake up.

2)      They got carpel tunnel syndrome, as much as they like you it just hurts too much to text you back.

3)      They can’t read and are too ashamed to tell you.

4)      They gave up texting for lent.

5)      They decided to become Amish, they will explain the next time they see you.

6)      Your last text was so witty and funny they don’t want to embarrass themselves with a boring response.

7)      They are painfully boring and are pretending to be busy.

8)      They broke all their fingers in a freak accident and they don’t have Siri.

9)      They got your text in class and the professor made them read it out loud. Now the thought of texting you back makes them relive that painful experience.

10)   They are worried that their phone is being tracked by the government so they have it off at all times.

11)   Their phone got stolen by a bunch of hooligans.

12)   They don’t watch girls so they don’t understand a text with the emoji panda, gun and a present.

13)   They prefer to only talk in person (you are better off with that sick fuck out of your life).

14)   They don’t understand sarcasm via text so they think you are always mad at them.

15)   They got shot in the head in a gang fight and they don’t remember who you are.

16)   They dropped their phone down a flight of stairs; they are selling their blood to pay for a new one just to text you back.

17)   They have food on their hands and they don’t want to get it on their phone.

18)   They are pooping and only like to text you during classy moments of their life

19)   For snapchat: They got your picture when they looked a hot mess they are busy brushing their hair.

20)   They are dead RIP.

Those are clearly the only reasons why someone wouldn’t text back someone as fabulous as you! Be sure to follow me on twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/ and if you need to stalk my life more I have an Instagram too Alyssa1620.