LIU Post Oral Competency Exam

If you are reading this blog post you most likely go to Long Island University Post (or C.W Post) and you have to take the Oral Competency Exam. Now there is very little information online about this test and no one I know took it. Yet we need it to graduate. I'm writing this post because I'm a senior and I waited to the very last semester to take this test. The night before the test I tried to find information on what to expect. There is nothing so I'm going to document my experience taking this test so you know what to expect.

First you have to make an appointment to take it. I made mine during common hour. The test is only supposed to take about 10 minutes. The test takes place in the speech building (it’s behind the book store). You walk into the office, and you tell them your name. They will have you sit in the waiting area; there are a lot of old people there because they run a speech clinic. Once they are ready, a grad student will call your name and take you to a room. They will ask you a few questions about your hearing and then give you one of those hearing test where you have to raise your hand when you hear the beep. After you take the hearing test she gives you a sheet of paper with a paragraph on it and you have to read it out loud. The one I had to read was someone talking about their grandfather it was really weird. Just make sure you read it slowly and clearly.

That's it! It's a really easy test and I don't think anyone fails it, but I wanted to have some information on it online so future students don't get worked up about it like I did. I hope it helps!

As always follow me on twitter and tumblr. Also feel free to ask me any C.W Post related questions :).

Dr Oz 3 Day Cleanse

Two weeks ago I did the Dr Oz three day detox cleanse.  If you are thinking of doing it I should warn you it is extremely hard. I did it with my mom and I wouldn’t suggest doing it alone. Also I would suggest doing it when you are busy, although it is hard to get work done when you are hungry; it helps take your mind off eating. Here are the logs I did on my iPhone over the three days. Warning I was VERY bitchy and VERY cranky. But, this is an honest description on how the cleanse goes.

It's 9:15 on Tuesday night: I'm starting my 3 day cleanse tomorrow, its 4 different shakes made out of different fruits and vegetables. It's not supposed to be one of those cleanse that makes you drop 10lbs. in 3 days, however it is supposed to help you break your unhealthily habits and kick start your weight loss. Which I desperately need because I just stuffed my face with a croissant as a last meal cause you know I'm being overly dramatic and actually feel like I'll never eat again. I just hope not eating for 3 days doesn't turn me into a raging bitch! Lord help all the people who have to interact with me during these next few days!

9:00Am Wednesday: I had my first smoothie for breakfast and took my multi vitamin and my probiotic. The smoothie wasn't bad I got used to it and started to like it. I already messed up though! I completely forgot to have my detox green tea! Ugh! Maybe I can have it tonight instead.

12:00pm Wednesday: Time for meal 2! I put it in a water bottle to take it work. It is green and mushy and kind of hard to choke down. I think there might be coconut in this one and that's why I don't like it. I hope I'll be able to finish it. I really want a tuna melt.  

6:30pm Wednesday: It took me 2 hours to finish meal 2. Right now I'm starving! I'm drinking meal 3. It's much better than meal 2 but still not great. I feel like crap I'm tired and I feel like I'm coming down with a cold. I hope this crappy feeling is just all the toxins leaving my body. I don't know if I'll have enough energy to work out tonight or do my paper. This detox totally sucks!

9:30pm Wednesday: I've finished all my meals for the day and had my detoxing bath. The bath is with Epsom salt and lavender oil and very relaxing. The Epsom salt makes you sweat so it's another way of ridding your body to toxins. I've decided that I'm not actually hungry I'm just going through with drawl. I've been craving carbs all day and feel a little light headed I think that's because I'm addicted to them. Hopefully after this cleanse is over I won't crave processed carbs anymore! I'm optimistic that tomorrow will go better now that I know what to expect.

9:00am Thursday: I remembered to have the green tea with a lemon this morning. I feel really sick though and I don't think I'll be able to choke down breakfast. I can't wait for this cleanse to be over.

10:30am Thursday: I was able to drink my breakfast smoothie and I feel much better. I guess I didn't feel good because I was hungry. The breakfast smoothie is defiantly my favorite

1:00pm Thursday: I made a few modifications to meal 2. I added some water, melted the coconut oil, and put a few extra pieces of pineapple. The changes made the taste and texture more bearable but not by much. I actually feel pretty good now.

5:30pm Thursday: I'm starving and drinking my last meal right now, I don't even care about the taste anymore I just want something to fill me! This detox couldn't be over fast enough!

9:00pm Thursday: I just had my Epsom salt bath. I feel okay still kind of hungry I was supper cranky today! I yelled at almost every person I talked to, I was even kind of snippy to one of my professors. Right now I'm being stubborn because I don't want to make my meals for tomorrow. I cut myself while cleaning the blender and now I'm mad at it. Oy! I think I'm starting to lose my mind! Counting down the hours till it’s over!

8:30am Friday: IT'S MY LAST DAY! I couldn't be happier! I was so hungry last night I couldn't sleep. I'm choking down my green tea now. The only thing that is going to get me through the day is that it’s my last day!

9:00am Friday: I drank my last breakfast smoothie. I'm not really full from it. Today is going to be a long hungry day.

2:00pm Friday: I'm hungry cranky and miserable! The third day is the hardest. I can't even look at the green mush, let alone drink it. I hate this!

6:30pm Friday: I couldn't finish my lunch smoothie it was just too hard to choke down. I feel tired, grumpy, and weak. The dinner smoothie helps a little bit, but I'm still hungry! Thank god this is the last day!

*******I went out with friends Friday night and skipped the Epsom salt bath********

10:00am Saturday: So I ate real food today! It was amazing! I also got weighted today and I lost 8lbs!!! I'm super excited but also extremely nervous that I won't keep it off. The problem with these cleanses are that once you start eating again you gain all the weight back and sometimes more. Overall I'm not sure if I would do this again. It was extremely hard and I was miserable the whole time. I'm defiantly going to try to eat less.

 

It has been two weeks since I did the cleanse. I was able to keep the weight off so far. I’m thinking of trying it again when I feel my eating is getting out of control. If you are interested in doing it here is the link with all the information you need http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/dr-ozs-3-day-detox-cleanse-one-sheet. Also note it came about to be way more than 16 dollars a day per person. If you want to try it and have any questions about it you can tweet mehttps://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin or ask me on tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/.

Laugh Out Loud Worthy Blog : One Year Anniversary !

     Happy first birthday blog! One year ago today I wrote my first blog post! I'm very proud of myself; I was able to keep this blog going and get a few readers along the way.

     I remember writing my first blog post, it was the Wednesday before The Hunger Games came out and I just ordered my mockingjay necklace. FYI: I still have that necklace it has become a lucky charm that I wear every day. Also I ended up getting an A in that international business class, I think it was all the online shopping from people in China ;).

     A lot has changed in the last year. First I should talk about my most popular blog post "Rejection Hurts!" It has over a hundred views and it gets the most search results. So if you ended up reading this blog because you searched “Trader Joes rejection letter" or "how to laugh at rejection” let me give you a update. I now work in the marketing department of a consulting firm. It's a paid internship the perfect job for me. If I didn't get rejected from Trader Joes I probably would have taken the job, worked there all summer to make my parents happy, and I wouldn't have gained any experience in the field I've been studying for the last 4 years. Also I would have never have written that blog post and you would have never found me and we wouldn't be best friends! I consider everyone who reads this blog my best friend. Even if you are a creepy old man who isn't allowed to be within 100 feet of a school, we are best friends. So I call being best friends with you a win! To recap what we just learned.... If you get rejected from Trader Joes, you get your dream internship and over 100 new best friends!

     So let’s see, what else has happened in the past year? I survived Hurricane Sandy, it was a bitch, my family didn't have heat or power for about two weeks, and my school was closed for 2 weeks and we had to make up all the missed classes. I took 7 classes last semester; it was annoying making them all up. In the end I was lucky compared to most people. Some people lost everything! If you are looking to donate to help Hurricane  Sandy Victims click here -> http://sandyrelief.org/.

     This year I also discovered my love for reading. I've read tons of books this year and if your interested to see how I rate d and what I would recommend you can check out my Good Reads profile here -> http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/11416778-alyssa.

     If you are reading this blog because you searched my " texting" post,  "why you shouldn't scare old people" or " how to be less awkward"; you should be happy to know I still save my funny texts, I still play hilarious pranks on my family, and I'm still extremely socially awkward. So there will be tons of posts about that stuff.

     That's my one year update! Stay with me this year there are way more blog pots to come! As all ways follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and Tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/! Thanks for reading !

8 Things I Would Do If I Was The Retired Pope

The pope retiring today got me thinking about what I would do if I was retired, especially if I was as cool as the Pope. Warning not meant to be offensive just silly…

 

 

1) Date a  Kardashian:

Now that would be a reality show worth watching

 

2) Live tweet every Hollywood event:

He has a twitter might as well make good use of it


3)    Prank call Mel Gibson: 

 
There’s no reason I just think it would be funny


4)   Write a “tell all book”:

 

He has to have the juiciest gossip (think of all the confessions!)


5) Become the Easter bunny:
 

It’s still kind of in his field of work


6) Become a contestant on dancing with the stars:



Church choirs have the best rhythm he could be good too!


7) Start a pope boot camp:

 

Help train prospective popes and give lessons on how to rock that hat


8) Become a judge on American idol : 



He would have good authority to decide who sings like an angel

Reasons Why He/She Didn't Text You Back

Have you ever sent a text to someone only to have it rudely ignored? This happens to me a lot! Now being that I’m a total narcissist, know the reasons I get ignored aren’t because of me. Here are some very real reasons why your boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend, mailman, lab partner etc. didn’t text you back.

1)      They saw your text and got so excited they fainted then hit their head. They are in a comma and will text you as soon as they wake up.

2)      They got carpel tunnel syndrome, as much as they like you it just hurts too much to text you back.

3)      They can’t read and are too ashamed to tell you.

4)      They gave up texting for lent.

5)      They decided to become Amish, they will explain the next time they see you.

6)      Your last text was so witty and funny they don’t want to embarrass themselves with a boring response.

7)      They are painfully boring and are pretending to be busy.

8)      They broke all their fingers in a freak accident and they don’t have Siri.

9)      They got your text in class and the professor made them read it out loud. Now the thought of texting you back makes them relive that painful experience.

10)   They are worried that their phone is being tracked by the government so they have it off at all times.

11)   Their phone got stolen by a bunch of hooligans.

12)   They don’t watch girls so they don’t understand a text with the emoji panda, gun and a present.

13)   They prefer to only talk in person (you are better off with that sick fuck out of your life).

14)   They don’t understand sarcasm via text so they think you are always mad at them.

15)   They got shot in the head in a gang fight and they don’t remember who you are.

16)   They dropped their phone down a flight of stairs; they are selling their blood to pay for a new one just to text you back.

17)   They have food on their hands and they don’t want to get it on their phone.

18)   They are pooping and only like to text you during classy moments of their life

19)   For snapchat: They got your picture when they looked a hot mess they are busy brushing their hair.

20)   They are dead RIP.

Those are clearly the only reasons why someone wouldn’t text back someone as fabulous as you! Be sure to follow me on twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/ and if you need to stalk my life more I have an Instagram too Alyssa1620.

Best Texts of January 2013

I'm getting really lazy and don't feel like writing alot for this blog post, so I decided do another "best texts post".  My friends never fail to crack me up and every one of these text messages made me laugh out loud. Once again I’ll keep everything anonymous, but read them and see if you see yourself in here. Best texts of Jan in no particular order:

 

                                              We talk about animal poop a lot... 

 

 

The best parties are the ones that don't require pants...

 

 

 

 

The epic whale shit....

 

 

 

 

That's one way of making things awkward...

 

 

 

 

Some people don't care about feelings....

 

 

 

 

Somebody isn't in the mood to talk....

 

 

 

What lovely words to say in your bra's memory....

 

 

 

 

Best idea ever...

 

 

 

Snapchats from a ailurophile.....

 

 

 

 

So there are some of the funniest text messages I've gotten this month. I love doing things like this because it shows my friends are just a weird and fun as me. I promise I'll do another blog post that actually has stuff written by me soon. I started a thing called "drunk blogging" and I'd like to get some of those up soon. The only problem is drunk writing is alot like drunk texting and it is a bitch to edit. Remember to follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and Tumblr www.xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com

 

How To Be a Little Less Awkward

Hello there, happy 2013! So since I’m going back to school this week I thought I should write a post about something. I was looking at my stats on this blog and twitter and I’ve come to the conclusion that people seem to enjoy my socially awkwardness. I have terrible social etiquette and tend to make all the people around uncomfortable. If you are one of those people that I offend with my social awkwardness IM SORRY AND I PROMISE IM LEARNING FROM IT! Well sort of. Here is a short list of some of the things I’ve learned over this winter break.

1)      If you are going to wear spanks to a party, commit to it. You can’t decide half way through the night to take them off in the bathroom and put them in your purse. It’s not classy.

 

2)      It’s not up to you to fill all the awkward silences. Awkward silences can be well…awkward, but that doesn’t mean you have to fill it with a random fact about your life. Everyone would rather deal with a little bit of silence then know that you haven’t washed your hair in a few days. Let someone else change the topic.

 

3)      If you see a cute guy at a party/bar, don’t stand outside the bathroom while he is in there. It’s creepy.

 

4)      If you invite your friends over your house, you have to wear pants.

 

5)      Celebrities can pull off the grunge look, you cannot. You have to brush your hair before you go to work.

 

6)      When talking to strangers about penguins, you don’t have to tell them how often they poop. Especially when they didn’t ask.

 

7)      Just because you worked at a Chipotle once, doesn’t give you the right to go through their cabinets to look for cup lids.

 

8)      Don’t open a jar of pickles and eat it in the backseat of someone else’s car (Sorry Sara).

 

9)      The office is no place for a mustache T-shirt.

 

10)   Ask people if they have read the book/ seen the movie, before you complain about the ending.

 

11)   You can’t just randomly quote T.V a show especially if the people you are with don’t watch it.

 

I thought I was going to have better/funnier things to put on this list, but as soon as I went to write stuff down I couldn’t think of anything good. If I remember better ones I’ll add them.  In the meantime follow me on twitter https://twitter.com/Alyssa_Channin and tumblr http://xdalyssaxd.tumblr.com/.